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Launchpeer Review

Launchpeer

Launchpeer prides itself for being trained experts in making the startup of your dreams a reality. If you ever feel overwhelmed with building one, they got you. They’re like the handyman for startups, a “program that specializes in  taking first-time founders from idea to first customers and investors” as they put it. To be clear, I’m not confirming that they’re legit trained experts just yet. That’s in the review below where I’ll also answer whether Launchpeer is worth investing in or not.

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I must admit, the moment I saw their website, I already had doubts about their claim. Like, okay, there’s still a chance that they’re actually trained experts, but I’m not holding my breath. They won’t even bother fixing their website, so why would I expect them to fix a more complicated sh*t like your troubles on building a startup?

What they say, don’t judge a book by its cover. Using the analogy where Launchpeer’s book is their website, I’ll still f*cking judge them anyway. I swear, their website is so goddamn bad that I wonder what the hell are those previous Launchpeer’s clients smoking when they paid for these mfers service. They realized it’s awful now, spoiler alert BTW, but to say that Launchpeer sounds and looks great initially? Where’s the good sh*t they’re talking about ‘cause I see none.

Seriously. I assume that this awfulness is what got their site lots of snaps, around 170, on the Wayback Machine. But since some didn’t see through it, I’ll point them out here. Starting with their sh*tty copy. The best example for that is the countdown timer you’ll see at the very top of their homepage. Just having a timer itself is already bad, yet they’re still able to make it worse.

So, false scarcity aside, here’s what it says: “Applications to to our next cohort close Sunday at 11:59 pm EDT.” Leaving that “to to” is definitely a no-no. Like geez, how could they let that slide? Again, it’s on their homepage, the very first thing you’ll see innit too. Point is it’s definitely not buried on some obscure pages, so I can’t see any reason for missing the obvious typo. Are they dumb or fishing for dumb? Could be both TBH.

Next would be the overall look of their website. Looks like it’s created by a highschooler who just learned the basics of HTML and knows no sh*t about anything else. Their use of <marquee> tag to insert a scrolling area of text says it all. The main issue, however, are these three: Awful color scheme that’s too bright, faulty alignment of photos on some browsers (they should be good on almost everywhere), and the inconsistent typeface. Just a complete eyesore, ugh.

They’re not doing a decent job on things simpler than building a startup. So, as expected, they’re actually not doing well on something they’re supposedly “trained experts” too. All they do is promise the world to make a sale, but then deliver close to nothing. They’re also notorious of not giving any f*cks no mo’ when you’re done paying ‘em, so they insist completing the payment right away. As one of their clients put it, “scammy services with no replies to emails after money sent.”

Launchpeer Review

Again, all are real clients’ words, not mine BTW. To quote a guy who fortunately got out before the bill became ridiculous, “There were so many unsatisfied clients that Launchpeer… tells you all you need to know about the incredibly poor education and support you get from Launchpeer.” Lucky him that he only got cheated out of $1k, but the usual cost of Launchpeer is much more than that. Specifically, the price of Launchpeer usually starts at $10k.

$10k that could go up to a whopping $70k. That for either zero or crappy prototype just like their website. Their series of training? Deemed very basic— you’re better off purchasing a $20 book, they say. Don’t expect one-on-one coaching too, they just don’t do that. How about hooking you up with their connections to get funding for your startup? As expected, there’s none. No connections, no funding, nada.

In conclusion, instead of getting your startup built up, you’ll just suffer a setback for the wasted funds that did nothing. Obviously, I’d say that Jack Hare’s Launchpeer is not worth investing in. Not at all. Quite surprised no government bodies are tailing their scummy ass yet. What a bloody ripoff.

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